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Marriages and parental consent

by Monsurat Momoh
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There have been a lot of problems surrounding marriages and parental consent. Because in Nigeria, our parents already tell us the type of people they want us to get married to and the people they do not want.

So, we are already configured into thinking there is a “right” tribe to marry from and a “wrong” tribe to avoid. Also, the “right” religion to get married into and the “wrong” religion to avoid. Our parents have much more experience, what do we “younglings” know?

Of course, our parents can advise us on what to do but do they really have the right to change our choices? Marriage is a lifelong thing that only involves you, your partner and the little or large family you will build together.

Our parents are the best but if we are the ones getting married, should we not know our best pick?

Mistakes or not. Failed marriages or not. Regret or not. Happy homes or not. People should be allowed to make mistakes and own them.

This does not guarantee that whatever choices we make which may or may not be different from our parents will be good or bad. But where’s the satisfaction in knowing you got what you wanted?

This does not mean to “rebel” against your parents and elope or something chaotic. Parents should be respected which is why their advice is always considered.

Because they have seen and experienced it all for us. But what’s a better way to learn without experience? Why do children see fans and stick their fingers in them?

Although love has no boundaries, marriages involve two families and not just two people. I would totally ignore my parents and be with whoever makes me happy because happiness is key, always.

I would prefer though, that we all understand that I would be the one in the marriage and not them. So my choice should be valid too. Not just theirs.

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